The Hot List

Back in my high school and college years I used to keep lists: what homework needed to be done, which roommates were in charge of which household duties, and even goals that I had set for myself (back when I actually used to write them down). I had one list in particular, though, that was my favorite. And that was the list I kept in my 7 ring Franklin Planner (You all had one. Admit it.) that had all the names of every guy I ever went out on a date with. It didn't matter if he was my current boyfriend or just a casual friend who took me out once. If we went on a date, his name was on the list. I realize that many of you are probably laughing at this and wondering why I would do something so petty as to keep a list of everyone I dated, but truth be told, I did it after a seminary teacher told our class that we should date at least 50 people before we got married. What better way to keep track than to just write them down? It made things simple. I kinda expanded upon this list by adding stars next to some of those names. Those were the ones I kissed. The ones with two stars? The really good kissers. (I later learned that my youngest sister followed in my footsteps and kept a list like this also. I must have been a really good example to her because her list was covered in stars just like mine, although the number of her stars WAAAY outnumbered my stars...seriously. That girl put me to shame.) (My other sister might have kept a list too, although she probably kept it hidden from me. We might have had stars next to the same name. You never know.)

I have been thinking about my dating years, and I've realized how much my tastes have changed since then. There were things back then that put a guy on "The Hot List." In other words, they did something that made me swoon, drool, become weak in the knees, etc... You get the idea: something that made them "hot." Twenty years ago my list was made up of things like this:

1-Musical Ability-How could I resist those boys who could sing, or would sit and play the piano? It was WAY hot. MY future husband would DEFINITELY have to be able to play the piano and sing to me if we were to ever get along for eternity.

2-Dancing Ability- Back then, few things were really more important in life than a guy with the ability to lead a girl across the dance floor in the ever romantic country swing. If I had kept a list of good dancers back then, I would have put a star next to any guy's name if he could lift me off the floor and spin me around a few times in the air over his head before gracefully putting me down mid dance. (*Aaron) Dancing was definitely on The Hot List.

3-Creativity- In the little turkey town where I attended college there were not many places to take a date, so creativity scored big points. I dated one guy who could neither sing (gasp!!!), nor dance (strike 2!), but holy cow, did he take me on some creative dates. Canoeing, moonlit 4 wheeler rides (LOOOVED those...), and even horseback riding. Creative dates = The Hot List.

4-A good head of hair. By college you could tell which of the guys were going to lose their hair and which wouldn't. My future husband would definitely have a full head of nice thick hair....

Fast forward twenty years, and my Hot List has changed dramatically. Things that were once so important to me, are not so much now. Don't get me wrong. I still appreciate all of the afore mentioned things. But now my list looks something like this:

1-Cooking- A man who can cook demands my respect. Especially if he does it for me. And the kids. And cleans up afterwards. Holy. Hawt.

2-Every Sunday my hubby (who is definitely hot!) breaks out his box of fingernail polish, lines up his daughters, and paints their nails for church. We're talking a base coat, two coats of color, and a shiny top coat. Toes and fingers. A man who is good with children and does things that break defined gender roles: definitely hot.

3-A good sense of humor. Few things are more attractive to me than someone who can spontaneously make me smile. Two stars if you make me laugh. =D

4-Brains and proper grammar. Silly, but true. I am easily impressed with someone who is smart, knows the language he speaks, and speaks it properly. I'll add a star by your name if you use big impressive words. Two stars if punctuate and capitalize when you text.

5-There really is nothing sexier than a man wearing an apron with his hands in the sink doing dishes, except...a man who scrubs toilets! Be still my beating heart! The thought of a man on his hands and knees scrubbing crusty pee off the toilet is about the hottest thing I can ever imagine. Seriously, folks. It's like Melinda porn.

A couple of weeks ago I added something new to my Hot List after attending the Air Show at HAFB. As I stood there and watched these crazy, brave, daring pilots rip through the skies, I decided that "flying" definitely needed to be on the list. I don't know why I hadn't thought to add this before. I've grown up with the sound of F16s flying spontaneously overhead at all hours of the day and night. I think I may have even cursed at a few (PG rated, of course) as they would wake up my sleeping babies from time to time. But suddenly, that day at the air show, I was in awe and somewhat weak in the knees at what these fly boys could do with their jets and aircraft. They would tumble and turn, dive and flip, and do all kinds of circles. UH-MAY-ZING! And don't even get me started on the Thunderbirds in their fitted blue flight suits and the stunts THOSE boys pull in the skies. Holy Wowzers! Hotties. All of them.

So hats off to the boys in blue, and every other fly boy, fighter pilot, daredevil, thrill seeker who straps himself into a plane and travels at the speed of sound. Hats off to all of you, as well as to all of you dads who cook, clean, do laundry, paint your daughters' nails, scrub dried pee, and make your wives laugh. I applaud you. I salute you.

You are officially on The Hot List.

(For those of you wondering if I ended up

dating 50 guys before I got married....

My Mike was #51. True Story.)