My Sewing Dungeon. Uncensored.

WARNING!!! The following post contains graphic pictures and may not be suitable for those with a weak stomach, the faint of heart, or those with OCD.

Let me just get it out of the way and say that I am embarrassed to post this picture. Liseanne made me. It's her fault. If it distresses your stomach too much, please blame her and direct any urges to throw up in her general direction.

So here it is: My sewing dungeon. Unfiltered. Uncensored. A few year ago I gave up my nice sewing room so that my girls could each have their own room, and I moved into an unfinished corner of my basement. Unfortunately, this was also where all the "stuff" (aka: junk) was stored (thrown) , and in time, well, you can see what happened. It makes you just WANT to go in there and sew, doesn't it? I mean, really! Who wouldn't want to escape to a peaceful place such as this and spend a few hours just sewing and getting away from the clutter in the rest of the house?
One day, I threw up the white flag and accepted defeat. I was surrounded by too much "stuff" to even begin to know where to start cleaning, so I just walked away. (I have tried this approach with the laundry, but it doesn't work well, for those of you who may be contemplating it.)

Enter: Mom and Liseanne. "We are coming over on Monday to clean your sewing room!" They announced with happy and excited tones to me. My white flag was still flying, so I wasn't even the slightest bit hopeful that ANYONE could even get that room to be presentable. But Monday morning, there they were. All 7 of them (Liseanne's kids in tow) and we were off to work.

That's Joanna on the phone. =)

Around lunch time, Dad and Mike showed up to see the progress when Liseanne says to Mike: "We think Melinda needs a work table to go along this wall and a shelf above it." I never would have asked him for such a thing. I wasn't even thinking that I needed a table there. But Mike has a soft spot in his heart for my sisters and their requests so.... An hour later...
I had a nice table...and a shelf to go above it.
So here it is. The "after" picture. It really is the same room. I promise.
I am still in awe about it. Sometimes I walk downstairs and go peek behind the curtain just to make sure it's still there. And there it is. (Enter angelic voices) A special thanks to Mom and Liseanne (and Mike too, of course) for doing this for me. I cannot thank you enough for saving me from my sewing dungeon and giving me back my sewing room.

Madison A. (Soon to be Madison Archuleta!!)

Hi this is Madison!!! My mom is at choir right now and i was bored so i thought i would just say hi to everyone so....HI!!! As you all know I am A huge David Archuleta fan!!! I don't quite know how to post pictures of him so i guess i will do that when i can get help!! BYE!! =D

The Joys of Having A Two Year-Old Boy

Hi! This is Morgan! My mom is outside weeding. She doesn't even know I am doing this. I would just like to share with you all the "joys" of having a little boy :).
Here are Cam's pastimes;
1. Eating toothpaste~ he climbs into the sink and looks all relaxed while he is eating toothpaste. We now keep ALL the toothpaste in a drawer WAY up high.
2. Dumping out the pink milk mix/powdered cheese to the Easy Mac all over the floor and then eating it. Like the toothpaste, we keep that in a locked drawer.
3. Taking video games and unplugging them while they are playing them and saying, "MINE!!".
4. Ripping off the keys to my Mom's laptop. Now we have the whole bottom row torn off. More to come. ;)
5. Peeing on the carpet. He has learned how to take off his pants AND diaper! Isn't he genius?
Now, I love Cam and LOVE having him in our family!!

Our Spoiled Kids

As a child, I always wondered what I would have to tell my children about "what we didn't have" when I was a child. I remember sitting in the front room of Kiddie Kollege at Grandma's old blue typewriter thinking that I would tell them, "When I was little, you actually had to lift your hand up OFF the keyboard and push the lever on the right of the typewriter to get the paper to scroll down to the next line! No return key or anything fancy like that. AND.... Don't even get me started about if you messed up! Good thing Grandma kept all that White-Out in the top left drawer of her desk in the office!

Little did I know then how big my list would end up being as I told them about all the things I didn't have as a child. Sheesh, it makes me sound ancient! Anyway, I think the following sums it all up very well. (My favorite part is about Napster and shoplifting music.) Enjoy and go ahead and admit that you remember every single thing the author mentions! I know I did.

Unknown Author -
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty five miles to school every morning . . . uphill BOTH ways .. yadda, yadda, yadda
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on our kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it! But now that . . . I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I Mean, compared to my childhood, you brats live in Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got it!
I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have THE INTERNET. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!!
There was no e-mail! We had to actually write somebody a letter... with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!
There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to go to the record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and mess it up!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it!!
And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!
You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had Atari 2600! With games like "Space Invaders" and "Asteroids" and the graphics stunk! Your guy's were a little square! You actually had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until it died! .. Just like LIFE!
When you went to the movie theater there was no such thing as stadium seating! If a tall guy or some old broad with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you were screwed!
Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15 channels and there was no onscreen menu and no remote control! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on!
You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your bum and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Sat. morning. Do you hear what I'm saying?!? We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little brats!
And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove or go build a frigging fire... imagine that! If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot!
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy! You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980!
Regards,
The Over 30 Crowd

Book of Melinda, Chapter 1

1-And it came to pass that on the 14th day of the 5th month, behold, my father and I set out for the land Farmington in which we would labor at the place called Lagoon. And behold, the land was covered with many rides of strange creations, the workmanship of which was exceedingly fine. Yea, and there were also many geese with their young in the land.

2-And my father dwelt in a shake booth.

3-Yea, and it came to pass, that my father and I, being assigned to labor together, did work many hours in the booth, making ice cream shakes, serving beverages, and mopping an exceedingly many times.

4-And it came to pass that my children, being left alone, did murmur exceedingly saying, "Behold, our mother leaveth us again! For behold, we grow weary of her absence. Yea, thou has missed many of our programs and field trips, and even a maturation program in which the reproductive system of boys is discussed. Yea, our loss is great! Yea, even more than we, thy children, can bear! And behold this is not all, for behold our eldest sister thinketh that she is a ruler and a leader over us and is the cause of much sorrow."

5-And it came to pass that I said unto my children, "Have ye forgotten the cause for which I labor? Have ye been so swift to forget that, yea, in two weeks time we shall reap the rewards of my work. Behold, we shall venture together unto the land Farmington, unto the place Lagoon, and spend much time making ourselves merry. And behold, thy sister I have appointed to be a ruler and a leader over you. For behold, she is wise for her years and knoweth much of caring for young. Wherefore, murmur not against her. For she is obedient unto the task which I have given her."

6-And it came to pass that my children repented of their murmurings.

7-And it came to pass that the mountains of laundry in my dwelling did increase exceedingly, the likes of which I had never seen before in all my days. And I did cry unto the Lord to deliver me from the chains of bondage that consumed me.

8-And it came to pass that at the end of my days, I would return, being much fatigued, unto my place of dwelling. And behold, I did find my establishment to be not unto my liking. For behold, there was much disarray and clutter. For behold, my children, in my absence did keep themselves busy with the likes of crayons, papers, glue, scissors, snacks, TV, and an exceedingly great number of messes.

9-Yea, even my last born did wear a sign duct taped to his back that read, "Dad, change me!" For he stinketh. And behold this is not all, for I did also find my child of 4 years to be in her pajamas still at the time appointed for dinner.

10-And it came to pass that I was exceedingly wroth with my children, because they had neglected to remember the things which I, their mother, had taught them. And it came to pass, that there was much weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth.

11-But behold, they did again repent of their doings, and I, being their mother, was quick to forgive them.

12-And it came to pass that on the 30th day of the 5th month, my father and I had accomplished the thing we had set out to do, and were rewarded with many passes unto the place Lagoon.

13- And it came to pass, that my children did rejoice exceedingly upon seeing the fruits of our labor and did exclaim with one accord, "Behold, we knew all along that our mother was right! For behold, she has accomplished that which she said she would do, and for this we are exceedingly glad!" And my children did shower me with many hugs and kisses and with much gratitude.

14-And I, their mother, was content, knowing that our days would be filled with joy and laughter, and also knowing of the leverage that I had thus obtained over my children for the rest of the summer.

15-And behold, I, Melinda, kept all these things and pondered them in my heart.